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A Dementia Partner's Story

Lena dressed in a blue smock and black pants is looking at herself in a full-length mirror, bursting with laughter at her reflection
Marathon Years

Through the Looking-Glass

As a carer, you always have to be on the look-out for dementia dangers – even in the home.

Lena's having a wonderful time in the kitchen, furiously whisking the dough for her famous bullar (cinnamon buns). Alan's standing at the side with hands outstretched to catch the dough if Lena whisks too hard

Bio

I’m Alan Miles, and I spent over 10 years caring for Lena after she was diagnosed with early-onset Alzheimer’s.

Now I’m writing our story of love and dementia in ‘The Marathon Years‘ — a new chapter each week.

And I’m proposing an exciting new approach to dementia care with The Care Combine.

More about us here.

A portait by Dale Webster, showing the face of a Kenyan woman looking directly at you, as described in the poem, which is on the right-hand side of the portrait.

A Perfect Model

Portraiture and poetry combine in this 2012 collaboration between Dale Webster and Alan Miles, who met up again this week

In two separate shots, Alan rowing, and then Lena, perched up on the stern seat. The waters of the lake and slate-blue and rippling gently. The mountains sit behind.

Wiggling on Windermere

Dementia doesn’t necessarily mean the end of adventure. This short story recaptures a memorable day.

Lena is leaning back against our black hire-car on a sunny morning, ready for the journey. Her arms are raised on the car to embrace the sun

Sharing the present

Dementia made it difficult to share the past with Lena. But sharing the present was still precious.

A hand is taking a blue and white sock out of the washing basket.

Life with meaning and purpose

For people with dementia, loss of meaning and purpose is maybe even more important than loss of memory. So let’s change that.

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Social media?

Almost everything I do is here on the website – except my running, which is on Strava.

But if you happen to use any of these, please follow me. It all helps to spread the word.

Newsfeed

I’m testing out Bluesky — a Twitter/X alternative — to tell friends what’s going on in my life right now. I’m told that Bluesky is a quieter place to chat with friends — without people bursting into the room shouting at us and telling us how we’re supposed to think, or trying to sell us something, or showing us how many pies they can eat in 20 seconds.

We’ll see.

Below is a carousel that scrolls through my last 5 Bluesky updates. Tap or click to pause the carousel and go to the actual post on Bluesky to comment, quote, repost — everything you’d expect on social media.

Let's Share

Please share your feedback, thoughts and suggestions with me. You can comment on my posts, or contact me directly at alan@milesposts.com.

And perhaps you know others who might enjoy or take comfort from my stories and ideas. If so, please tell them about milesposts.com. And if they scan the QR code, they’ll be taken directly to this Home Page. 

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Read the Care Combine articles

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Let’s make our social care initiative a reality.

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Alan Miles speaking to an audience